Tag: sex advice

I’m friends with a girl (also a girl) who is married. i have a mad crush on her lol but obviously dont expect anything. Anyway she allllways flirts with me/touches me and I’m wondering if i should put that in check? Kinda dont want to, but guilt lol

Nip it in the bud!

No good can come of it. It might be totally innocent on her part or intentional, but that’s not good either. The point is that you’re DEFINITELY feeling something inappropriate for her (inappropriate because she’s married) so make sure that gets shut down hard and fast before anything else has a chance to develop.

I know the flirting is fun and feeds your crush and it’s all feeling mostly harmless right now, but you’re also giving it room to grow, allowing potential, which is dangerous. You do not want that kind of mess. Not ever.

I’m 22 years old and have crush on a girl for the first time (only been into guys before, never had a BF and have only hooked up with one guy). I know this girl a little bit from the gym, she’s a trainer there and we have mutual friends (so I know that she’s had a GF before) but I’ve only chatted with her in person and on FB a couple times. She always seems happy to see me, but she’s a sweet, enthusiastic girl, so I have no idea if she’s just being friendly or might be attracted to me too…

…I’m wondering if you think it’s a good idea to become friends with
her first, or just ask her out on a date.  Either way, I want to get to
know her more, but is it a better idea to let her know from the
beginning that i’m interested in dating her, not just being friends?

Hang out with her a couple times, get to know her a little better before coming right out and asking about a date. Flirt and put the vibe out there that you’re interested. When you feel the moment’s right, ask her out, or if it’s going really well, maybe go right for the kiss. Depends on the person, the situation, and what you’re both feeling. You can ask her to hang out without needing to define it as “friends” or “date”. Coffee is subjective! 😉 “wanna grab some coffee?”

Just don’t go too long without letting your interest be known, you don’t want it to end up being this awkward secret that you meant to tell her about, but never got around to and then it’s been so long that it would just be weird to tell her that you’re into her.

Basically, you don’t have to go right for the date, let things happen naturally, but definitely spend some time with her, flirt with her, and let her know what you want before any kind of misunderstanding happens.

My boyfriend just told me he doesn’t enjoy the “Daddy-Dom” lifestyle and he does not enjoy woman that do… This is all I’m about. All day everyday it’s what I want crave and need… We compromise very well, but my obsession vs his repulsion will not work out.. He refuses to break up, but I don’t see how we can jump this hurtle.

I don’t see how you can get past it either. It’s a very fundamental difference in your sexual needs. You’re not getting what you want (and neither is he) so how is this a relationship that has a future?

He can’t refuse to break up with you. Both of you are still holding on to somehow making it work. But with this, there’s no compromise that will be satisfying enough. You’re hoping he’ll somehow grow to like it and he’s hoping that you’ll grow out of wanting it. It’s not going to happen. People don’t change like that and it’s unrealistic (not to mention unfair) to expect them to.

Many relationships end because of crossed wires or lack of spark in the sex department. It’s okay. You’re allowed to break up with someone for that. You’re allowed to want more sexually. I’m sure you both care about each other a lot, but this is definitely one of the “deal breakers”. It’s not shallow or wrong to end it because of different sexual desires. Give yourselves permission to find more fulfilling relationships by going separate ways.

He can’t refuse to break up with you if you actually MEAN it when you do it. It has to be something you genuinely want, otherwise you’re just going to be treading water – going nowhere.

Tips for going down on a girl?

hersheywrites:

the-art-of-oral:

  1. Don’t be a bitch. If you’re gunna do it, do it well. 
  2. Tease the fuck out of her before going in. Put that tongue away. Kiss every inch of her, except her pussy. Inner thighs, neck, lips, nipples. Start at her mouth, work your way down. Did you get her neck already? Good, now do it again. Build the anticipation. She’ll love it even more.
  3. When she can’t handle the anticipation any more, go in for the kill. Eat that pussy like you’re on death row and it’s your last meal. 
  4. Most girls respond really well to clit stimulation, but don’t over work it. Some girls like it when you stick your tongue in, some don’t, so be cautious when exploring that option.
  5. The best way I’ve learned to do it is to start off slow. Long licks. Cover all of it. Slowly work your speed up. Go a little faster. Every been told to write the alphabet with your tongue? Fuck that. It’s stupid. 
  6. Have her lay on her back, put her legs over your shoulder. That’s the one of the best positions for her to get max pleasure. It also allows you to use your hands. While your mouth is going to down reach up with your hands, grab her breasts, (some girls like their nipples squeezed when getting eaten out. Try exploring that option if she’s down). You also have the options of using one of your hands to finger her or rub her clit while you lick. If you get into a good motion of licking while you rub her clit with your tongue, I can almost guarantee that she will go crazy.
  7. Think you’re done after she cums? WRONG. You’re not done until she grabs you by the hair and pulls you up because she can’t take it any more.

Now go my student, go and eat that pussy like it’s your sole purpose in life to make that girl scream your name, Gods name, and every swear word she’s ever heard in her life.

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(Part 1) Hi! So I have a few questions. Well, I’m a virgin and i have a bf who’s had sex before, he has assured me that he understands me and I’ve slowly allowed for other things such as fingering and giving him a handjob… so I’ve been thinking of

(Part 2) going all the way but idk. He doesn’t want to use protection
cuz it’d be my first time and I kind of want to that way but I’m not
sure if the day after pill would be good enough? Also, Idk how to give a
bj, like are u supposed to swallow the cum?

(Part3)
And idk, I’m just kinda freaked out that I won’t do things
‘well’. Please help, he’s the first person I’d do these things with and
you know, first time and all that. I feel so lame asking this 😳 also, I
sometimes feel,Idk embarrassed

(Part4) of my body &whether or not he’ll enjoy stuff 😯 I’m
hopeless. Please help. (Sorry for not sending a single ask but I’m on my
phone which has a letter-limit) Thank you in advance~ a hopeless, naive
virgin

You have to use protection. Whether it’s a condom, a diaphragm, birth control pill, nuva ring, whatever. You cannot have sex without protection because you will very likely get pregnant. Unprotected sex = pregnancy = babies. The morning after pill is not meant to be used as a normal contraceptive. It’s a “in case of emergency” pill. In case the condom rips or there was some kind of an accident or if you were raped. It is NOT something you use after you have sex every time. It’s not designed to be used that way and it’s not safe for you to use like that.

Go on the pill. If you take it within 5 days after the start of your period, you’ll be protected from pregnancy. If taken at any other time, it’ll take 7 days for it to go into effect. See a doctor.

If you do not know one of the methods that I mentioned, then you shouldn’t be having sex yet. You need to be better informed and the best way to do that is to find a health clinic and talk to a medical professional who can give you all the information you need as well as provide you with an effective form of birth control.

Now, being on the pill prevents pregnancy, but does not protect you from STD’s or HIV. A guy telling you that he doesn’t want to use protection? Well, I can tell you from experience he’s likely had unprotected sex before. Probably with more than one girl. So now you’re putting yourself at serious risk with only “his word” to go by. Protect YOURSELF. Stand up for YOURSELF and your HEALTH. Just use a lubricated condom – it’s not going to make or break the deal. He shouldn’t have asked you that to begin with! It’s just stupid and incredibly irresponsible!

I’ve already answered many questions about BJ’s and first times. Take a look at the Sex Advice Tags page and browse through it. All your questions will be answered in there. “Oral” and “How To” will probably be the best ones to help you with what you’re looking for.

Be smart, protect yourself, and don’t ever rely on anyone else to do that for you. Sex can be an incredible experience or it can be a nightmare. Being informed, mature, and responsible will lead to it being a great experience.

can anything bad happen from using someone else’s vibrator

If you clean it properly and thoroughly, it shouldn’t be a problem. If you don’t clean it, there’s bacteria that can be transmitted and possible STD’s.

Also you better have permission to use it because if you don’t, I can assure you there might be some fallout of the physical and/or verbal nature – and that I can’t help you with!

To the anon who didn’t feel she could have toys, you could always get one of those three or four legged back massagers from Walmart or somewhere, if you want to go the vibration route. They’re pretty cheap, usually fairly quiet, and your family won’t think of it as a sex toy; they might even ask to borrow it (learned that from experience). You can always just say you need it for your shoulders or neck to help relax before bed! That’s what I did for my first one :)

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I’ve been going through your masturbation tips, but I couldn’t find anything that could work for me. I’m a female that has a difficult time getting an orgasm from clitoral stimulation. My fingers aren’t enough but because of my current living situation (living with my parents) I can’t conceal or use any toys. Any suggestions for me?

You can’t hide any toys? Really? It’s called the underwear drawer! haha. If you think that what you’re missing is deeper penetration then you don’t need a vibrator (which is the noise you’re worried about). Glass dildos have gotten really popular as of late. They don’t make noise, they’re slick and smooth – lube lasts longer with them, you can get a ribbed one for extra stimulation, and the best part is that if anyone sees it by accident – it doesn’t scream SEX TOY! outright. You could probably get away with passing it off as a cool artsy paperweight, lol. 

Another idea is maybe you could use a clitoral arousal gel. There’s a hundred different brands that offer them. You could probably find one at any drugstore or you could just get it from Adam & Eve (cheap). Anywhere. It could help you get that one step further that you need to reach the finish line. Clit gels enhance your sensitivity and makes it easier for you to reach peak arousal. It’s not a guarantee of orgasm by any means, but it’s a little extra help! If you’re worried about ordering anything sexual online, don’t worry, it all comes in a plain brown box with no indication of the company on the outside. They protect your privacy!

Still don’t want to risk it? Go old school. Get a cucumber! (Zucchini, carrot, summer squash, purple eggplant, and so on…) Clean it and use a condom if you can – you don’t want to risk any contagions or irritants. Women using a vegetable to masturbate is a time honored tradition!

Bath time! Use a showerhead.Or turn on the faucet and let the water run over your pussy. The best use of it is to roll your hips and fuck the water stream basically – letting it hit your clit over and over and over again.

My last thought is that you should try branching out from just using your fingers. Have you tried humping? You can hump your hand, the side of a bed, an exercise ball, a stuffed animal, a pillow, anything you have on hand. It’s about experimenting. Those are all soft edges. You can also try harder edges and see if those work better for yourself. Slide your pussy up and down anything firm that’s flat or round or shiny – a bedpost, pole, a railing, a TV remote, a candlestick holder, a bicycle seat, or a chair arm!

Try masturbating on your stomach. On all fours. On your knees. Sitting up. On a chair. Even just changing the angle by scooting up a little more or lying further back will change how it feels. You have to break out of what your usual routine is and get creative.

Yeah, living at home with the parents cramps your style and makes it more difficult to just relax and get what you need, but it doesn’t make it impossible. Try to get some time when they’re not home. Close the door (lock it if you can). Turn off the lights, Close the blinds. And just relax. Let yourself enjoy it, let yourself make some noise. Doesn’t matter if you orgasm every time, just try to enjoy the pleasure you get on the way there rather than fixating too much on the end goal (it’s counterproductive).

Hope something in here was helpful! Have fun!