Tag: sex advice

do guys like neck kissing and lip biting too? also, do you have any advice for neck kissing?

Most guys absolutely love being kissed on the the neck! Drives them crazy! Occasionally they’re too ticklish, but don’t worry, it’s not going to make it or break it if you try kissing his neck and it turns out he’s too ticklish for it. You just know for future reference that he’s too ticklish there.

As for lip biting, most guys are into that too (just not too hard!). Although, I find the ears are a bigger thing with guys for biting. They often like being licked around the ear, nibbling on the earlobe, breathing on their ears, etc. Big turn on for them!

It’s different for every guy, so you have to experiment to see what works for each of them, but definitely test them out and see what the guy responds to!

Neck kissing…first, think about what YOU like being done to you and turn that around for him. After experimenting, you’ll find what he likes the most. It’s the same thing where everyone is different, so you never know what will work without experimenting.

The basics? Start by letting him feel your breath on his neck. Then kiss him, nibble on him, use your tongue (don’t slobber!), suck a little (hickeys are juvenile so don’t even). Experiment. Try traveling from his jaw to his neck to his ear. Start slow and light and work your way from there becoming increasingly passionate.

FUN THING TO TRY?

Eat an ice cube and then immediately after, lick a part of his neck with your cold tongue then warm it up by kissing the same spot with your warm lips – no tongue. The different temperatures stimulate the nerves and feels awesome! It’s the same idea as using as ice cube on a body part and then warming it up with your mouth. You could also hold an ice cube between your teeth, run it over his body, and then follow the same trail again, kissing it with your warm mouth and tongue. Hot/cold is great for stimulating arousal!

Stupid question, i really want to make my boyfriend come I’ve given him hj and bj but i always stop early because i dont know what its going to be like. i love the fact that i get to please him and i’m ready to be doing all that. i hate the fact that i tease him and never let him release! but yeah what should i do? should i have a chat to him about it?

Definitely talk to him! If you’re feeling nervous about it, you need to explain exactly that to him – let him know what it is your feeling/thinking. Guys need us to spell it out for them, they respond well to a direct “this is what’s going on” approach. They do not understand mixed messages and get confused very easily so the best form of communication is the one that is as straightforward and honest as possible.

What is it exactly that you’re worried about? Some white stuff is gonna come out and you just wipe it off with whatever you have handy. That’s it really. Just make sure you’re not in the way so it doesn’t get on your clothes and make a mess. Also don’t let it get in your eyes! Burns like a mofo. 😉

If you’re really worried about taking it all the way to the finish line,  try this: do what you usually do and then when he gets close, instead of stopping altogether, have him take over. Tell him to finish himself off. So he’ll jack off in front of you and you can watch and see for yourself without worrying about the responsibility. He’ll think it’s hot if you ask – anything so that he gets to come! Once you see it the first time, it’ll never be a big deal again, haha.

Do you want me to post some “cum shot” gifs for you so you have an idea of what it’s going to look like?

I’m 17 years old girl. I lost my virginity couple of weeks a go to a guy and after that we’ve fucked one time. I really like this guy but we’re not together. Now everytime we talk about sex, he tells me that he would like me to be on top. My problem is that I want to try it but I’m afraid that I don’t know how to do it. I have a lot of pressure about that. Like, having sex in general is a new thing to me. How to be on top? what should I do to make him get the pleasure?

Okay, first off, don’t let this guy pressure you into doing anything you don’t feel comfortable with or ready to do. If you’re feeling self conscious about being on top, simply tell him that you’re not ready to do that yet. If he has a problem with it then he can go fuck himself.

I know you said you want to do it, but your hesitancy makes me question if it’s what you want for yourself or if it’s what you want to please him… You see?

Do only what YOU feel comfortable and prepared to do. Don’t let him dictate what positions you’re going to be in! You just had sex for the first time! You’re not even dating! Just tell him you’ll get on top when you want to, but not right now. Not until you feel more confident about sex in general.

When you’re totally ready to climb up there (and it has to be coming from YOU and YOUR DESIRE to get into that position) read this post from an anon question I answered a while back.

A girl on top makes it all about the girl. It’s about you and what you like and what makes you feel good. He’s your playtoy and you’re doing whatever the fuck you want to him. This is why I’m advising you to wait until you feel more comfortable with sex because being on top means exploring what feels good for you. You’re setting the rhythm, the pace, gyrating, whatever it is you like. Until you’re ready for that kind of control…take it slower and if this guy isn’t okay with that, then you need to find another guy. End of story.

First Time?

I’m about to lose my virginity this weekend and I’m nervous. Any advice?

  • Be sure this is what you want and not about anyone else, first and foremost.
  • Don’t expect miracles. It’s not going to be that great (the first time), but if you’re with someone you care about, it will be wonderful in a different way – beyond physical pleasure.
  • Don’t do anything you feel uncomfortable with. You have the right to say no and to stop at any time you want. Always remember that!
  • Relax and let yourself be in the moment. Don’t make yourself a wreck with worrying about how to do this and that and all the ‘technical’ things. Do what feels good, act on instinct, and take it slowly.
  • If you can manage to have an orgasm BEFORE penetration, it’ll make the whole experience so much better. Tell your partner that and try to make it happen.

Be safe and enjoy yourself!

My boyfriend and I have sex alot, and it is good, HOWEVER, I have been diagnosed with endometriosis and sex hurts for me alot. Is there any way of avoiding this? can we do other stuff to get the same effect?

I’m not a doctor! This is really a question for your gynecologist and I strongly advise you talk to them about it. There’s no need to be embarrassed. Your doctor will know what you can do and what will be effective taking your diagnosis into consideration.

That said, penetration is the issue, correct? Well, it would do you a service to use all those things you considered “foreplay” before as more of a central focus now. Oral sex is the best! 😉

Also, I don’t know how severe your condition is, but I have heard that different positions actually help make it less painful. Missionary is the worst, but side by side and doggy style are a little more comfortable because of the angle of penetration. Try it and see what happens? If not, back to oral and foreplay – all day, every day!

Again, please, PLEASE, discuss this with your doctor. It’s not anything new for them, they’ve had this discussion a thousand times over with women with same problem. So suck it up and go talk to them about it. If you want a healthy sex life – that’s what you need to do to get it.

Before anal what should i do to get all the waste out of my ass? Also will i bleed?

Try to make sure you go to the bathroom at least an hour before having sex. Shower and soap up everything really well. If you are able to go, then don’t worry about ‘cleaning out’. Just clean your asshole in the shower! 🙂

If you can’t go, then maybe you can use an enema at least a few hours prior to having intercourse. If you do it right before you have sex, it dries you out and you’ll be more prone to rips or tears. You can buy a disposable enema kit at your local drugstore. It’s not healthy to do an enema very often so practice sparingly. There have also been studies done where it shows that enemas or any other kind of “waste cleansing” measures taken can cause more problems than they solve and have been implicated in the increased transmission of STI’s (including HIV).

Just be aware that it’s not necessary to “anal douche” before having anal intercourse. If you’re regular and not constipated, you’ll likely be clean inside already. The waste isn’t stored there. You’re also going to be using a condom (RIGHT?) and that’s the safest, cleanest way to have anal sex.

You should not bleed if you do it properly. You need to go really slowly, prepare your body for it (anal stimulation like rimming, slowly working lubed up fingers in, stretching your asshole by spreading out your buttcheeks, etc.), and use PLENTY OF LUBE. Seriously, there is no such thing as too much lube during anal.

If you bleed afterwards, that means rectal tissue got torn or damaged during sex (which should not happen!). You need to have your muscles be relaxed and open and your partner can’t be too rough with you. Rough anal will cause bleeding.

I’m sure I don’t have to say this, but I will anyway. WEAR A CONDOM. It’s not just for safety – it will allow him to move in and out of you more easily and prevent anal fissures (tearing).

I’m 17 and been with my first proper boyfriend for 5 months now. i’m not very experienced but i would like to rub him down there. I’m not ready for sex and i’m not ready for a proper hand job. do you have any advice on how I could do it through his underwear, how long and how to keep it hot while making out? thanks

Well, that’s a bit problematic because how far do you plan on taking it? I completely understand not being ready for anything more and you should wait as long as you need, but if you tease him too much, you’re going to give your boyfriend a serious case of blue balls and that’s just mean. So until you’re ready to actually get him off, I would keep that kind of touching/teasing to a minimum.

You can massage him through his pants, cup him there, put your knee in between his legs while making out so it rubs against his crotch, straddle him so you can dry hump, etc.

But do this sparingly and not for more than a few seconds because he’s going to have a massive hard on if you do too much and then with no release, that sucks for him. If he does come, then it’s gonna be in his pants and that’s a sticky, gross mess for him and it doesn’t sound like you’re ready for him to be doing that either. So the best thing you can do to make it easier on your boyfriend (and your relationship) until you’re ready for more, is to avoid getting him too excited.

Keep kissing. Keep taking little steps that you feel comfortable with. But keep in mind that he’s a teenage boy with very little control over his body’s reactions so to be the best girlfriend you can be is to understand that and hold off on touching below the waist until you’re ready for more there. Don’t feel pressured to do anything for him. You’ll be ready when you’re ready and if he’s the kind of guy you want to be with, he’ll respect that.

i want to try anal. i’ve gotten fingered in the ass before and loved it. its my first time and the person who is up for it is sorta on the larger side. i already know the basics of how to do it and be safe and what not but, is there any way for me to loosen it up a bit before. like masturbating it or something?

How to loosen up on your own?

butt plug

With your partner?

LOT’S AND LOT’S OF FOREPLAY. THIS IS CRUCIAL.

You have to take it really slow and work your way up to it. Rushing is the absolute worst thing you could do. Rimming, stretching your asshole, lubed up fingers, even slapping your ass, all of that will help your sphincter relax and prepare itself. You, yourself, also need to be relaxed otherwise it’s just not good. So try having your partner eat you out while playing with your ass, that way the combined pleasure and stretching/finger play will open you up and relax the muscles there.

KEY PHRASE: If it hurts, don’t force it.

Enjoying Anal Play

Dumb question, when a guy eats you out is there anything you are supposed to do while he is doing the deed? And another dumb question, will he think the v is gross and ugly? I always thought mine was kinda ugly, but that’s just me:p

Your vagina is a beautiful flower. WORSHIP THE V. It does magical things.

When a guy is eating you out, your only job is to enjoy it and do whatever you want to make it more enjoyable for you. Hump his face, grab his hair, push him to where you want him to go, hold him there, roll your hips, WHATEVER YOU WANT. If you’re not enjoying it, then there’s a real problem there and you need to correct it ASAP. You can start by giving him some instructions during.

It’s all about you when you’re getting eaten out so be as selfish as possible because that’s the only way it’s gonna be any good! In that moment, your partner is there to please YOU. So take advantage of that.

Not dumb questions. 😉

Please help me! Any tips on how to give a good handjob ??

– Even with a handjob, foreplay is STILL important. Start off with kissing as always and then slowly move your hand down. Rub his inner thigh, stroke over his crotch when he still has his pants on, then you can gently take hold of him and massage his cock through the material. After you see him getting really into it (you should be hearing some sighs and groans), unbutton the pants and reach into his boxers. Still take it slow at this point, you’re still at foreplay, so consider it “teasing”.

– If you feel comfortable with it, go topless! (I’ve said it before, but guys are big on visual stimulation so getting to focus on your breasts will get them even more hot and bothered.) If you’re not there yet, try just wearing your bra. If you’re leaning over him, wear just your panties or nothing at all so he can see your ass. The more visual stimulation, the better. Also, eye contact is hot!

– LUBE. If he’s not slicked up with something, it’s gonna be hell on his cock so have something prepared! Oil-based or silicone based lube is best for a handjob because it’s slick and doesn’t dry up too quickly. However, if you’re planning to follow this up with sex or some other fun, go water-based because the skin will soak it up and you can move on. It just doesn’t last as long as the others. Now, if you don’t have that kind of lube available, body oil works just as well! Don’t have lube or body oil? Any kind of non-scented lotion will do. Spit should be a last resort because it’s just really not conducive for the BEST handjobs. So try being prepared okay? Get some KY, some Vaseline, ANYTHING. Honestly, if you carry around a small bottle of Johnson’s baby oil in your purse, he will love you forever.

– Find a rhythm and then work it. The goal is to be able to speed it up towards the end, but don’t go insane (especially if you don’t have the upper arm strength or enough lube – ow?).

– Hand positions. There are several different ways to use your hands. You can use your whole hand, your palms only, your fingers, or pinch your finger and thumb together to form a ring. All of the hand job “moves” are just variations of simple grip, stroke, and area touching. Do whatever comes to mind, play around, experiment to see what works and what doesn’t. It’s all fun!

– Best method? The two hander. Take both of your hands and grip the shaft. Ask him if he wants it looser or firmer so you know what the right pressure is. Don’t be too delicate, it’s not a flower! Grip it good, but still ask him what he likes so you know for sure what works. Then, slowly and rhythmically (always with rhythm!) twist both hands in the opposite direction while sliding up and down. It stimulates shaft and the head at the same time AND it makes him feel like there’s two people working on his cock, which he’ll love. Gradually increase your speed. Two hands are better and more interesting than one.

– Variation of pressure is ideal. Firmer going down, looser going up, then do the opposite. Switch it up!

– Keep your wrists loose. IT’S ALL IN THE WRIST. Don’t focus so much on your hands, instead your wrists. The way you flick your wrists and and swirl up and down is where the pleasure is!

– Don’t ever rub, you should always be sliding (or gliding) – you know what I mean.

– Midway through the HJ, give some love to his balls! Different guys like different things when it comes to playing with their balls, so you just have to experiment to find out what your guy likes. Go easy on them though! Be gentle. You can cup them, squeeze them (GENTLY!), move them around in your hands, and even stroke your fingers over them. On your way back to his cock, you can lightly scratch his balls with your nails.

– If you’re into it, pause the HJ for a moment and use your mouth on his balls. Either tongue them lightly or just put your mouth (NOT teeth) on them. If you’re a little gun shy about it, don’t worry. Just be gentle and whatever attention you give there will be received with great appreciation on his part!

– The head of the penis is the most sensitive part so you’ll want to pay more attention to that and be gentle with it. Don’t let it be your ONLY focus though. Use your thumb and index finger to form an ‘O’ shape and move it up and a down an inch or so over the head. You don’t have to move it much, you’re just trying to stimulate the head.

– Gonna use a big word for you! The frenulum is the most sensitive part of the head. It’s a little v shaped mark on the underside of his cock. Try taking a break from the regular handjob and spend like 30 seconds just rubbing the frenulum with light pressure before going to massage his balls and then back to up and down on his cock again.

– When he starts to orgasm and shoot his load, the usual instinct is to speed up your movements, HOWEVER guys actually like it when you slow down and release pressure as they start to orgasm. This is because when he’s orgasming, the head of his penis becomes insanely sensitive, to the point where it’s painful for him when you touch it. So backing off and going easier on him as he blows his wad is the best thing you can do for him.

– Try different positions with each handjob. You can straddle him while he’s lying down, you can kneel while he’s in a chair (make sure you’re comfortable!), you can sit next to him and reach over, etc. Change it up! Change is good. Keeps things new!

– Talk to him. Ask him what he likes. Ask him to SHOW you what he likes. Yes, that’s right, have him jerk off in front of you and then you need to take mental notes of how he does it. Who better to learn how to give a handjob from than the guy who’s been doing it to himself since he was 12?

HAVE FUN!