Tag: orgasm

So I masturbate and it feels really good, but right when I’m about to orgasm I can’t. It happens every time. What if when I become sexually active and I can’t orgasm? I want to buy a vibrator, but I’m not old enough. Any tips?

Try some deep breathing. Taking yoga classes inadvertently does wonders for your sex life just from learning how to breathe correctly.

You may not even realize you’re doing it, but many women react instinctively to encroaching orgasm by holding their breath. *RUDEBUZZERSOUND* That’s not going to help you! Try to be more aware of how you’re breathing. The goal is to feel the sexual arousal your body is experiencing and then EXPAND it by taking a deeper breath which draws out the pleasure even more.

Breathe deeply into your pelvic area. I know that sounds weird, but when you slowly draw in the breath, visualize where you want it to go. Imagine that you’re sending the breath into the vaginal canal before slowly exhaling through the nose. This creates oxygen, decreases tension, and increases blood flow in the pelvic area. It has a HUGE impact on your sexual pleasure. Trust me.

Hi, I am 16 years old and I’ve been with my boyfriend for almost 2 years, we just started having sex and it no longer hurts but it doesn’t exactly feel good. I don’t climax its just kind of there but no pleasure. Any advice? Will it just take time?

It sounds like you need to learn more about what you like and what makes you feel good. You can’t rely on your boyfriend to know how to do that for you. Expecting your partner to somehow be a brilliant sex god and know exactly what to do to please you is entirely unrealistic and pretty much ABSURD when it comes to inexperienced, young partners.

So what can you do? Masturbate. Bring yourself to orgasm. Learn about your body. Once you know what you like and what works for you, bring that information into bed and guide your boyfriend to where you need him to be (that you’ve just newly discovered!).

If the sex isn’t good, then you need to:

A) change something ASAP

B) break up.

Since you’re both very young and you’re new to this, I say go with option A. You need to learn what makes you feel good so start by taking more control and figure out what your body likes. Then you can help your boyfriend understand what you need by leading him through it and encouraging him to do different things that you know works for you (hint: rhythm is your god).

This is a learning experience for you both so experiment with new things, read about different positions to try, work on his staying power (I’m just taking a guess on that one), and masturbate! Whatever you’re doing now isn’t working, so change it.

Your goal is to have each time be better than the last. 🙂

Which orgasm is more intense? clitoral or vaginal

They’re two very different types of orgasms. Clitoral orgasms are generally considered more intense and even preferred by a lot of women. It’s more like a man’s orgasm – powerful, quick release, enjoyable.

Vaginal orgasms are more wavelike and last longer. You also can have multiple vaginal orgasms (one after the other) whereas you can really only have one or two clitoral orgasms before your clit gets too sensitive to keep going. Vaginal orgasms are deeper and more intense emotionally (if that makes any sense). You’ll find yourself needing time to recover after a vaginal orgasm.

It’s all about personal preference! Ideally what you want is to have the “full body” orgasm, which occurs with simultaneous clitoral and vaginal stimulation! Those are the ones that blow your mind and render you incapable of speech or movement for a period of time. 😉

I recently gave my boyfriend head for the first time, and he loved it. But I’m not sure if it’s the same for men as it is for women. When I orgasm, my clit is very sensitive so I don’t like him to continue giving me head after I finally do cum. But after a man cums, is he very sensitive down there? I can’t tell if I should swallow and then keep giving him a BJ for a little while longer, or just stop.

The absolute best thing you can do in this situation? Ask him. Talk to him about it. See what HE likes. Every guy is different.

However, yes, they get super sensitive after ejaculating, but you can gently continue for about 15 seconds after, licking his shaft and/or holding the base of his cock, just as a nice way to bring him down. Avoid the head/tip! That’s the most sensitive area and it’ll be way too sensitive for you to go near.

Some guys like it when you show a little love after they orgasm and some want you off their cock ASAP cause it’s too much. All based on personal preference! That’s why you should ask. 🙂

As for you though…I know how sensitive the clit is after orgasm, BUT women have the capacity for multiple orgasms and men do not! We were built for rapid-fire orgasms! Men need time to recover in order to work their way up again, but after a woman orgasms, she’s still aroused and can climax two or three more times much more easily and quickly after the first.

So instead of stopping altogether right after you climax, have him kiss you, play with your nipples, rub your thighs, and then after a couple minutes, go back down and continue giving you oral! He should avoid the clit when starting again, have him focus on other areas and stimulating the G-Spot with his fingers, then eventually come back to the clit. It’ll feel like it’s almost too much for you but then you’re going to EXPLODE. It’s fabulous.

Women are unfortunately far too neglected when it comes to sex, whether it’s because of lack of knowledge and education about our bodies or because of selfish partners. So you should take advantage of what we truly have to offer ourselves!

The key to multiple orgasms for women is to continue stimulation after the first climax. Kissing, rubbing, touching, grinding, humping, etc. All until you’re revved up and ready to go full speed again, which will happen within a few minutes! You need to keep your body cresting somewhere at the peak of arousal and you will have orgasms galore. He can eat you out, orgasm 1, then finger you and eat you out, orgasm 2, put his cock inside you at a particular position that stimulates the G-spot and the clit, orgasm 3 – lather rinse repeat! You can do this all night!

Men…however…you have to find a guy who can keep up 😉 Guys love to claim they have the stamina for all nighters, but when push comes to shove, they typically fall short of the finish line. It’s okay though! It’s not a test of natural sexual prowess (like guys think), but just something that comes with experience. Stamina is about endurance and the only way to build up endurance is through training. The more you do it, the more you push yourself a little more each time, the more endurance you’ll have!

Men, on average (it varies for each man, especially with age!), need a refractory period of 15-20 minutes before they can even think about going again. Women do not! In fact, that 15-20 min period will lessen our chances for a second or third orgasm. Good news is, men don’t have to use their cocks to please you so if your man is eager and willing, you can have plenty of fun without having to wait.

So your homework for tonight is to talk to your boyfriend, experiment with what he’d like after a BJ, and get cracking on some multiple orgasms for yourself! Report back and I’ll give you your grade. Don’t worry, I give points for effort. 😉

im a girl,how to stop squirting when having an orgasm? is it embarassing? it lookslike pee.

Wow. I have to say that’s an unusual request, lol. Most women are trying to figure how to make it happen once! 😉 Just to make sure that you ARE indeed ejaculating and not peeing: female ejaculation would not smell like pee and it would be a clear fluid. Now that we’ve established that…

You shouldn’t feel embarrassed about it! NOT AT ALL! Sex partners usually find it really hot because to them it’s like a testament of their sex-tastic abilities. (Even if that’s not accurate, haha.) It’s one of the most elusive types of orgasms! Honestly, you should submit some tips to this blog about what you do that gets you to squirt all the time. There are TONS of women who would love to know!

Squirting is usually linked to G-Spot orgasms. So to try to avoid it, I would suggest focusing on clitoral stimulation, gentler intercourse (not as frenetic and not with high intensity), and different positions that are NOT angled in a way to stimulate the g-spot.

Unfortunately, that’s only an educated guess. I really can’t tell you how to “stop”. I don’t think there is a way to stop altogether other than just not having an orgasm. Your body climaxes in a natural way and if ejaculating is what it wants to do, then that’s the way your body is!

Personally, I don’t think you should try to stop. It’s just going to make you afraid to orgasm, which is NOT something you want to do! Just put some towels down and gush away! There is nothing to be ashamed of and you’re actually lucky that you get to experience squirting at all! At least 75% of women have never even been able to experience it once…

hey! i have a boyfriend and we slept 2 times together and he fingered me several times, but every time i want to cum i have the feeling that i have to pee and i can not relax and this is so embarassing and awkward :(

Okay, well unless you have a weak bladder and have experienced accidentally wetting yourself at your age, then it’s highly unlikely that you’re actually going to pee.

It’s actually a very common sensation when approaching orgasm and often it’s a symptom of the G-Spot orgasm which can also lead to “squirting”. If that happens, a clear liquid (NOT PEE!) would come out.

The only thing you can do is accept the feeling and let it happen! Just give yourself over! You’re not going to pee on him. To give yourself more reassurance, try urinating before doing anything with him, that way you KNOW you have an empty bladder when the feeling comes around again.

Let yourself cum! It’s going to be okay.

So I am 17 year old virgin. I have a friend whom I am very open with, and she suggested using the water faucet of my by way of pleasuring myself. It felt good, but it felt overly stimulating at the same time. Tips or ideas?

Experiment with the water pressure – obviously the stronger it is, the more intense the sensation. So turn down the water pressure in your case.

Also experiment with the temperature – lukewarm or even cool is ideal. Some people like to change it up from cool to warmer once they get closer to climaxing! Or the reverse.

Move your hips so that the stream is not always directly on your clit. You want a slow, easy build up so back off when it gets to be too much and let the water hit a less sensitive area and then move back in again. Do this over and over again until you orgasm!

You have to play around with it to find what works best for you. Everyone’s different, but yes, waterplay is fantastic once you hit it right! 😉

i feel when i masterbate im about to squirt but i get scared so i stop. What do i do?

It’s an intense feeling so I get why you would be hesitant, but there’s nothing else I can say except you have to find a way to relax and let it happen. It’s a little scary, but it’s going to feel incredible! It’s all in your head right now. Once you make up your mind to let it happen, that’s what will change it for you. Nothing BAD is going to happen if you keep going with it. Try to approach it logically. You prepare yourself by being aware that it’s going to feel overwhelming, but you also know it’s OKAY for it to feel like that.

Let ‘er rip! (Or squirt…)

What are good sex positions to make girls orgasm?

It’s different for everyone! But here are some popular ones. (Psst…I’m assuming this is hetero, but if I’m wrong, I’ll post again for lesbians. I just assume hetero because straight women have a much more difficult time climaxing…)

1) Missionary  / with a pillow under her ass

Why? Deeper penetration, easier thrusting, his pubic bone will hit her clit, and the higher the pillows/angle of penetration will increase stimulation of the G-spot.


2) Doggie style / on her stomach

Why? Increased friction as he moves in and out and she can grind her clitoral area against the bed. CLIT ACTION IS NECESSARY!

3) Crisscross / facing each other

Why? If she takes a long time to orgasm, this one is good because you don’t tire out as easily in this position. It’s more relaxed. Woman on her back. Man on his side and turned towards her. Woman should have both her legs over the man’s hips and thighs, making a bridge. Thrust easily until climax!

4) Reverse Cowgirl / WOMAN ON TOP IS BEST (so any position with her on top really)

Why? Ugh. So many reasons… The woman gets to dictate the pace and the depth of thrusting. There’s easy access to the clit. She can touch it, he can touch it, or his pubic bone will rub against it.  With Reverse Cowgirl, the woman should put her legs together instead of full on straddling. The tighter the fit, the more intense the sensation. Also, there’s increased G-Spot stimulation, so that combined with the clit action makes a very happy lady!

5) Spooning / side by side

Why? Intimate. Creates a tighter fit. Allows the man to explore more with his hands, including stimulating the clit, breasts, etc. It’s less moving in and out and more staying inside her with shallow thrusts. Cuddly. G-Spot stimulation. Need I go on?

6) Butterfly / Counter Top / Modified Missionary (so many names for one damn thing)

Why? Visual stimulation for both. The angle is great for deep penetration. If you do it on a counter top or a desk, the change of pace from the usual bedroom is exciting. There’s G-Spot stimulation. This can also be done on the edge of the bed with the man standing. He can lift the woman’s ass and drive into her at a great angle that she’ll love!

Ok I’m a girl and whenever i masturbate I just can’t make myself cum. I’ve tried a lot of things but I’m not old enough to buy sex toys. Any suggestions?

It takes time and patience. You’re probably rushing yourself and pushing to orgasm when that’s exactly what you can’t do. It doesn’t work like that.

Set aside an hour or two where you know you’re going to be completely alone. Take a bath, relax, get yourself into the mood, and work yourself up slowly. Guys have it easy where they can just pump themselves into a frenzy for a minute and boom! Girls need more time and it relies a lot on your state of mind. It’s not just what you’re doing, but what you’re thinking, and what you’re allowing your body to feel.

Keep experimenting, focus on relaxing, and you’ll make it happen!