Tag: masturbating

i’m 17 and live with my mom I’m too afraid to look up on google homemade like dildos and whatnot. do you know of anything I can use at home besides a shower head and fingers

There’s this cool thing called “delete browser history”! You should try it. Keeps that nosy Mom out of your business. 😉

But since you asked, a cucumber is generally the go-to item for those times where your fingers are just not enough and a trip to the sex shop (whether in person or virtual) is out of the question. Other veggies with similar shape will do as well.

Use lube and wash the cucumber before you use it (and after?) lol.

Anyone else wanna chime in with your fav every day go-to item? So many possibilities, so little time…

hey! i slept the first time with my boyfriend and it was the first time for him too. he could not cum and he said he could not really feel anything, is it because he was masturbating so much (i’ve read your post about that)? maybe you could help me because i don’t know what to do :$ thank you :)

It’s very possible that too much aggressive masturbation could be the cause, but I’m a little worried because that excuse sounds a lot like a guy trying to make up some bullshit reason as to why he “can’t” wear a condom – because he can’t “feel” as much… If that’s the case, tell him to fuck off. You don’t need that kind of assholery in your life.

Now, I could be completely wrong about that! I have no idea what your situation is. So if it’s not that or an issue of masturbating, then it could possibly be a physical problem, or perhaps drug-related, prescription or non-prescription. It may be because of strong religious injunctions and/or guilt; the idea of not wanting to surrender to a woman; or, even fear of pregnancy! There’s a lot that goes into a guy’s state of mind when he’s not able to ejaculate. Either it’s a real physical problem or there’s something going on in his mind that’s stressing him out too much.

It was your first time! Keep trying. Make sure your movements have enough friction happening. If all you were doing was grinding, that could be the problem right then and there! If the same thing happens every time, then he should see his doctor about it. Remember though, this has NOTHING to do with you. His inability to orgasm is not your fault by any means so do not put that on yourself!

To be safe, tell him to keep his hands off his dick for a few weeks, try to have sex a few more times, and see what happens!

KEEPING IT UP

When in intercourse, my dick sometimes start unhardening so theres much less pleasure for both of us. Any thoughts on why that happens? Is it because I have more pleasure when I masturbate?

There’s several different factors that are a possibility as to why you might go soft during sex.

1) You’ve been drinking.

2) You’re stressed out and your mind is on other things. If it’s money or sports or family, etc. If you’re not in the moment, that could very well be the cause – especially if you don’t have a problem while masturbating.

3) Depending on your age, it could possibly be the beginning of ED (Erectile Dysfunction), in which case you would want to talk to your doctor about it. I doubt that’s it though.

4) You’re masturbating way too much and you need to cut back. Think of it like this: if you’ve been stranded in a desert for six days without water and you finally stumble across a spring, wouldn’t that be the absolute greatest drink of water you’ve ever had? Now imagine you haven’t masturbated or had sex for six days, and suddenly your girlfriend bends over and begs you to fuck her, don’t you think that you’ll experience one of the most mind-boggling orgasms of your life?

It’s about sensory deprivation for pleasure and you’re engaging in sensory overload which decreases your pleasure. If you’re jacking off every day or more than once a day, then sex isn’t going to have that much enjoyment for you because you’re all juiced out. Masturbation is great, yes, but fucking your girlfriend is better!

Also, when you masturbate really roughly with a hard grip and squeezing the head of your dick, it takes away from the sensation of entering something softer like the vagina. You’ve grown too accustomed to the pressure of your hand and pussy isn’t as forceful so you lose the sensation. CUT BACK ON JACKING OFF! And go easier on your dick. Masturbating should be about training your dick for sex, not ruining it. Stroke it gently, not aggressively. You want to increase your endurance and allow for pleasure, not completely ruin it for yourself.

So I am 17 year old virgin. I have a friend whom I am very open with, and she suggested using the water faucet of my by way of pleasuring myself. It felt good, but it felt overly stimulating at the same time. Tips or ideas?

Experiment with the water pressure – obviously the stronger it is, the more intense the sensation. So turn down the water pressure in your case.

Also experiment with the temperature – lukewarm or even cool is ideal. Some people like to change it up from cool to warmer once they get closer to climaxing! Or the reverse.

Move your hips so that the stream is not always directly on your clit. You want a slow, easy build up so back off when it gets to be too much and let the water hit a less sensitive area and then move back in again. Do this over and over again until you orgasm!

You have to play around with it to find what works best for you. Everyone’s different, but yes, waterplay is fantastic once you hit it right! 😉

i feel when i masterbate im about to squirt but i get scared so i stop. What do i do?

It’s an intense feeling so I get why you would be hesitant, but there’s nothing else I can say except you have to find a way to relax and let it happen. It’s a little scary, but it’s going to feel incredible! It’s all in your head right now. Once you make up your mind to let it happen, that’s what will change it for you. Nothing BAD is going to happen if you keep going with it. Try to approach it logically. You prepare yourself by being aware that it’s going to feel overwhelming, but you also know it’s OKAY for it to feel like that.

Let ‘er rip! (Or squirt…)

So I try fingering myself, and I never find it plessurable, just uncortable

So don’t finger yourself then? Just play with your clit and make sure you’re always REALLY wet. You don’t need to penetrate unless your body asks for it. It’s all about listening to what your body wants rather than doing it the way you think you’re “supposed” to do it.

Find something that makes you feel good. Forget about porn. Forget about what other people say. Do it your own way. Hump your hand. Hump a pillow. Rub your clit through your underwear. Anything you want. Find a way to make it feel good for yourself. Penetration is entirely unnecessary.

Ok I’m a girl and whenever i masturbate I just can’t make myself cum. I’ve tried a lot of things but I’m not old enough to buy sex toys. Any suggestions?

It takes time and patience. You’re probably rushing yourself and pushing to orgasm when that’s exactly what you can’t do. It doesn’t work like that.

Set aside an hour or two where you know you’re going to be completely alone. Take a bath, relax, get yourself into the mood, and work yourself up slowly. Guys have it easy where they can just pump themselves into a frenzy for a minute and boom! Girls need more time and it relies a lot on your state of mind. It’s not just what you’re doing, but what you’re thinking, and what you’re allowing your body to feel.

Keep experimenting, focus on relaxing, and you’ll make it happen!

Masturbating: besides using foreplay to relax, what can I do to loosen up? (female, never had sex before & I’m scared of hurting when the time comes)

Masturbating is the best way to help prepare yourself for your first time. And don’t be scared. It really doesn’t hurt that badly. It’s not great, but it’s not like you’re gonna scream in agony or anything! So calm down. The amount of discomfort you experience is determined by whether or not your hymen has been torn or stretched enough. It probably already is (especially if you’ve gone horseback riding, play active sports, hell – even riding a bicycle can cause it to tear). If your hymen is already torn, it won’t hurt much at all. It just takes a few moments of being uncomfortable before your body naturally adjusts to fit him. Slowly work your way up to using your fingers while masturbating, that will help your body with its first steps to the “invasion” ;). If you want to use a dildo to masturbate, that will help a lot too. It’s all up to you and on your terms – remember that.

As for your first time, the BEST way to make it the least painful and most enjoyable experience possible is to take it slow. LOTS AND LOTS of foreplay. Be SOAKING wet and horny as hell. Take your time! If he wants to rush things along, you tell that boy to slow the fuck down or it’s not happening. Set aside a lot of time for you to be together and not have to worry about being rushed. Make out, touch each other, just go slow. The act itself is NOT going to take this long (lol), but make sure you have like a 3-4 hour block of time where you know you’re not going to be interrupted or have to be anywhere. Having that security of time will help you have patience and be able to live in the moment more so you’re not just “skipping right to it”.

Have him go down on you, or do some heavy petting, anything, so that you have an orgasm before any actual penetration occurs. The more aroused your body is, the more prepared it is. After an orgasm, the vaginal channel is wider so you won’t be as tight. Having an orgasm before you actually have intercourse is going to change the experience for you so much (for the better, obviously).

Use lube. Of course, you’ll be using a condom (SAFE SEX!), but use lube in ADDITION to the condom. Not only does lube actually help prevent the condom from tearing, but it will also give your body some additional help on top of your natural wetness so things move in and out niceeeeee and easy! 😉 Have you ever gone on a slip n’ slide that didn’t have enough water on it? …exactly. Ow. So, the more lubrication you have, the better! Since it’s your first time, your nerves and fears will affect how wet you get, that’s completely normal, so lube will help make up for that!

No girl’s first time is perfectly amazing. It will hurt a little bit and be uncomfortable (at first), you’re not going to have an orgasm from intercourse (another reason to have one before!), and you’ll be sore for at least a day after. Also, it’ll take a few times before your body gets used to having sex and you start experiencing real pleasure.

What will make the first time you have sex special is who you have it with and the intimacy that comes with sharing this experience with him. So make it count, take your time, don’t worry about it hurting, just appreciate every moment, and don’t expect magical orgasms coming out in waves. The real sexual pleasure will come later with practice.

You’re going to be just fine! 🙂