Tag: body

Do guys care about hair down there? Because i normally shave but when i do, it grows back like the next day, im scared that when i become sexually active its gonna be prickly down there

First of all, if a guy isn’t going to have sex with you because you have pubic hair — you’re not missing anything.  Secondly, it’s your vagina! Do what you want with it! If you want to shave — shave! If you want to wax — wax! If you want to grow that shit like a jungle and braid it, go the fuck ahead.  It’s your body, and it’s your choice. 

We like to impose our own views about what is and isn’t proper on one another and ourselves, when in reality it is a completely minor issue.  Shave, don’t shave, whatever.  That’s up to you.  But, don’t let whether a guy is going to find it attractive dictate what you do.

-teagan.

Okay so I explored myself for the first time today and I saw what looked like white stuff and maybe dirt around the clit? Is that bad? Am I gonna die?

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No, you’re not going to die.

It sounds like vaginal smegma to me (though be aware this is a guess and I am not a medical professional).

The vagina normally produces a clear or whitish substance to help cleanse itself and maintain a healthy environment. So it’s NORMAL to find white or liquid-y stuff down there. However, it should not have an overwhelming scent to it. So if you’ve found that your smell has changed (for the worse), smegma is probably the answer.

Smegma is a natural lubricating residue made up of shedded skin cells, skin oil secretions, and moisture, including sweat. Its cheesy like appearance can vary in color from almost white to a darker shade, depending on a person’s skin tone. Smegma gathers in the nooks and crannies of the body’s skin folds, including between the labia and around the clitoral hood.

Uncircumcised men have this as well, finding the same substance underneath the foreskin, but because of male circumcision, it is more common among women than men.

What smegma is known for is its characteristic smell, which some people find arousing and others find unpleasant. It’s not dangerous or life threatening or even an infection. It’s just a build up of normal bodily fluids so just gently wipe it away with some warm water. The mucosal skin of the genitals is sensitive so avoid using soap when you’re doing this.

Your body naturally cleans your vagina so soap is not necessary and many soaps are far too harsh to use down there anyway. I’m not saying don’t ever use soap down there, if you want to take the extra step to clean, use something like Summer’s Eve, but just know that rinsing yourself on a daily basis is really all your vagina needs to stay clean.

If you feel any pain, discomfort, or you find that washing it away is not helping the smell, then please seek medical attention! (You’re still not going to die though.)

4 Myths About Virginity

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As a sex educator, I find that I do a lot less eye-opening education about theory and psychosociology than I do myth-busting misconceptions about basic facts of anatomy and physiology.

And that’s not your fault, general public.

And in point of fact, I really don’t mind answering your questions, whatever they are—even these four! As far as I see it, I’m a one-woman public service provider, and I will do all that it takes to give you what you need.

And sometimes, myth-busting is exactly what you need.

Or, you know, adequate comprehensive, inclusive, pleasure-based sexuality education on a national scale, but I gave up Idealism years ago.

So let me put my Realist hat on to help you navigate through the murky waters of these four myths about virginity.

4 Myths About Virginity

coming from a girl. sex has been so uncomfortable so far, even though my bladder is empty, i feel the need to pee during sex and makes it so uncomfortable and unrelaxing. whats this about?

First of all, make sure that you don’t just have to pee! Make a trip to the bathroom before you start getting frisky, and see if that helps your problem.  Or if you have more impromptu sex, even if it disrupts the vibe, if you feel like you’re going to pee — go pee and then come back to your partner to continue.  Better safe than sorry, because obviously peeing on them is probably going to ruin the vibe — unless you’re both into that. Communication is key. (;

On the other hand, it could be something else.  There is always the possibility that the angle that you’re having sex from is allowing your partner to press against your G-spot.  In this case, after a bit of stimulation, that particular feeling of ‘Oh god, I have to pee!’ will generally pass and lead to an incredible orgasm if you’re lucky.  Generally, this happens more easily if you’re riding him, or you’re having sex from behind. Try a few positions, and try to work through the feeling and enjoy the experience with your partner who may have hit the jackpot by finding your G-spot.  It takes a lot of couples a long time to figure that out, so, enjoy it instead of feeling uncomfortable.

-teagan.

Hey! I’m a teenage girl who wants to lose her virginity with her boyfriend. My family is strictly Catholic and believe in no sex before marriage. I’m atheist though and I’ve been dating this guy for almost eight months. He’s got condoms, but should I be on a pill or something? We’re both virgins and neither of us have any venereal diseases. My main concern is pregnancy. My parents will not tolerate any kind of sex, so no help there. It’s too long to explain but my doc can’t help me out. Advice?

Condoms are only about 80% effective. Accidents happen with condoms – they can break or slip off or something could wrong. So, ideally, you want to be on birth control AND use a condom to be as safe as you possibly can.

If your doctor isn’t someone you trust to keep your confidence then I suggest you google free clinics in your area (such as Planned Parenthood). They will be able to help you with all your questions about safe sex, testing, and birth control needs. And, no, they will not contact your parents. They are required by law to keep your records confidential.

is it harder for a guy to cum when he has consumed some alcohol?

Alcohol definitely has a negative impact on guys when it comes to sexual function (more often than not). If they overdo it, it can lead to them having a hard time even getting an erection, let alone maintaining it.

Alcohol is a depressant. It works on the nervous system by slowing down brain function, breathing, and pulse. The effect is usually psychologically stimulating, you become freer and less inhibited. However, while it can boost sexual desire by helping a person to relax (hi girls!), it can decrease performance (hi boys!).

Heavy drinking for men decreases blood flow to the penis, reduces the intensity of their orgasm, and can dampen their level of excitement. Which basically means it’s harder for them to get it up, keep it up, or cum at all. Alcohol dulls the senses so they don’t get the same sensitivity or excitement. It just doesn’t feel as good!

Now, this is with HEAVY drinking. A couple beers will not render a guy incapable of having sex or cause any problems. It just loosens them up and increases their sex drive like everyone else. It’s the “overdoing it” part that’s a problem. Everyone’s tolerance level is different so it affects guys sexual performance differently as well. One guy might have a really hard time maintaining an erection after 7 beers, but another might be able to go ahead with business as usual! It’s really about how their body metabolizes the alcohol.

As a rule of thumb though: too much alcohol = bad sex. For men and women! So drink in moderation and stay sober enough to really be able to enjoy yourselves!

Hi there! Both my girlfriend and I, are virgins. We plan on giving each other our virginity and we talk about it a lot (I’m 17, she’s 18) I told her I would definitely eat her out because I’m comfortable with that and I want to please her also. I just have one question, is it sanitary? We’re both very clean people who haven’t had any sexual contact with anyone but ourselves whilst masturbating. I heard you’re suppose to wash your face after or not get cum on your face because of diseases? Help?

It’s absolutely sanitary! And, no, you’re not going to get an STD from having cum on your face or from not washing your face after sex…

If your partner has an STD or another communicable disease then you’ll get it from engaging in any form of unprotected sex – oral or intercourse. It has nothing to do with you leaving cum on your face for too long or something, haha.

Don’t worry about it. Just wipe it off with the back of your hand or on her thighs or her stomach or even the sheets, and keep on going! It would actually be incredibly insulting/rude if you just left right after eating her out to wash your face… Sex gets messy and good sex is even messier! Enjoy it!

On the flip side, semen actually contains properties that are really good for your skin! Weird but true…

After my boyfriend and i had sex, he ate me out. When he finished and came up to kiss me he had such a horrible taste in his mouth and all over his lips. It smelled like sweaty armpits and garbage and fish and just ugh. Obviously the first thing i thought was that it was from me. What could have caused that odor? He also caught a cold sore the next day. It looked bad. As if there were about 3 on his lip at the same time. I didnt want to stare though. We didnt discuss this afterwards either.

It sounds like you have a bacterial infection that you should see a doctor about for treatment and it sounds like you gave your boyfriend oral herpes which he should see a doctor for as well.

Mainstream porn is pretty indoctrinating. I agree that it paints a pretty unrealistic picture as to what constitutes good sex. With this in mind, I’m often concerned with the size of my penis. Now I’ve heard that performance and presence of mind are everything. But a number of random girls have told me that size does matter a little. Your thoughts?

nymphoninjas:

Regardless of the size of your cock all guys need to learn how to satisfy a lady with their mouth and hands. Mainly because most girls need more than just penetration to be pleasured, and also because if you can give your girl an orgasm before you even take your pants off you’ll feel much less pressure about your performance and size. 

Can you catch a cold sore from giving oral sex?

Okay, let’s start off by clarifying that cold sores are a form of Herpes Simplex – Oral Herpes (HSV-1).

When someone has an outbreak, which is when they have a cold sore or a fever blister (whatever you want to call it), that’s when HSV-1 is the most contagious. When the symptoms/blisters are present, when they’re actually on your mouth, that’s when you can easily give it to someone else. Sharing a cup, sharing a towel, and yes, oral sex. If you have an outbreak and you perform oral sex on someone, you are opening them to a high risk of infection.

Oral herpes is transmitted through direct contact between the contagious area and broken skin (a cut or break) and mucous membrane tissue (such as the mouth or genitals). Herpes can also be transmitted when there are no symptoms present. There are several days throughout the year when the virus reactivates yet causes no symptoms (called asymptomatic shedding, viral shedding, or asymptomatic reactivation).

So if you have an outbreak, refrain from kissing on the mouth and performing oral sex until the sore heals and the skin goes back to normal. However, a large majority of the adult population already has HSV-1 and it’s asymptomatic for many.

There’s also a reverse! By performing oral sex on someone who has genital herpes, it would be possible to contract oral herpes – but that’s rare. Most cases of genital herpes are caused by HSV-2, which rarely affects the mouth or face.

However, you will likely contract HSV-2, genital herpes, if you perform oral sex on someone who has it, especially if they have any open sores around that area. I don’t want to freak people out, but yes, you can contract genital herpes EVEN WHEN THERE ARE NO VISIBLE SORES.

So oral herpes is a very mild disease, there’s no cure, but the biggest issue is largely cosmetic. Genital herpes, with the HSV-2 virus, however, is more painful, and can be worse if you have a suppressed immune system. The sores are easily transferred to other parts of the body so you have to be particularly careful. Wash your hands immediately if you touch a sore.

Oral and genital herpes are manageable conditions so don’t panic. Yes, you should take all the precautions you can, but if you do contract the virus, it’s not the end of the world.

Talk to your doctor!