Hi, I’ve looked through a LOT of your asks and didn’t see any quite like this, so hopefully it’s not something you’ve seen a lot, if at all. My guy and I are in a long distance and don’t get a ton of time together, so we want to make the most of what we do get. However, I have yet to cum with him, not by his fault at all. He’s amazing. I’m just scared of the feelings. Any advice on how to loosen up? Masturbating doesn’t give me much feel, but his touch does, so I can’t get used to it beforehand.

I assume that when you say that you’re “scared of the feelings” you mean how overwhelming and intense an orgasm can be? Let me address that first.

1)

Try some deep breathing. It’s like you’re trying to breathe every
ounce of pleasure happening to your body further inside yourself. You
feel it more acutely and then you have to relax and ALLOW your body to
feel it (in the exhale). Men get all tight and clenched right before
they orgasm, but women need to be as calm and open to pleasure as they
can possibly be in order to allow their body to crest and fall over the
tipping point.

2) It gets intense and it can feel like too much. But don’t hold your breath or psych yourself out. Nothing bad is going to happen to you. It won’t hurt. Let it wash over you and build. Grab onto your partner, trust them, and let yourself go. This takes practice, but you can get there.

So, the first step is to talk to your partner about this. Tell him how
you’ve been feeling. He’s in it with you, you’re not alone. A HUGE part of being able to relax during sex is if you trust the person you’re with. Another aspect of it is having self confidence. Are you second guessing yourself a lot during it? Are you feeling insecure about some things? If you trust your partner, they can be a source of relief for you. If they know you’re having trouble letting go, they can help by slowing things down. It can be so sexy to have your partner whispering how hot they find you and reminding you to breathe into it, let go, tell you that you’re safe, how much they want you – really anything. Think about what he can do or say that would help you relax when you’re together, what would give you more confidence, and then tell him that! If he cares about you, he will want to do everything he can to make your experience more pleasurable. Talk it out.

Now, this is just a guess on my part, but it sounds like you’re putting a TON of pressure on yourself because you feel like you’re always running out of time with the long distance thing.

You gotta take the pressure off. Stop rushing it. Stop forcing it. Let it happen naturally. I know you want to make the most of your time together, but it’s not helping you to be so focused on this aspect. The key here is to stop thinking about an orgasm. It’s about the journey, not the destination. 😉 If you’re so intently focused on orgasming, that’s all you’re going to think about when you’re together. You’re going to hyper-fixate, obsess, worry, and then guilt yourself when it obviously doesn’t happen because you’ve been psyching yourself out the whole time.

Slow it down. Make out a lot. Heavy petting. Have him go down on you. Prolong everything you do before p in v intercourse.
Be soaking wet and horny as hell.

You wanna be halfway there before he’s even inside of you.  Then don’t think about having an orgasm, simply focus on experiencing pleasure. The less thinking you do, the more relaxed you’ll be, and you’ll get to just enjoy it all.

Some great sex positions for girls to orgasm