Dry humping sounds like your only choice if you want to rule out all the other ways… You could use vibrators, but if you’re not even ready to finger then I doubt that would be an option for you.
So…happy dry humping!
Dry humping sounds like your only choice if you want to rule out all the other ways… You could use vibrators, but if you’re not even ready to finger then I doubt that would be an option for you.
So…happy dry humping!
One, stop worrying about the specifics of your sexuality. Just focus on getting to know PEOPLE and allow yourself to be attracted to whoever you want.
Two, have you had sex with a girl or have you just thought about it? Because unless you actually try it, you really don’t know for sure. Especially if you find yourself attracted to women and it’s the sex aspect that concerns you.
Three, strap ons are a common presence in a lesbian sexual relationship (especially long term relationships). Both women get pleasure, it’s just in different ways. Again, you really won’t understand it until you try it. What’s the harm? Experimentation is the best thing you can do for yourself.
Why do you feel unsure about telling him? If you’re engaging in sexual activity with your partner, one of the first steps is to tell the other person your sexual history. I don’t mean every detail of it, just the bare bones. How many, have you been tested, etc. Just tell him you haven’t had sex with a guy before and that way you can hold off for a little while before explaining that you’ve been with a girl before. I think you should tell him, but if you want to wait on it so you get to know him better before revealing that, then wait.
Ask her. I’m assuming you guys are pretty young, so the best thing to do at your age is seriously just talk about it. Trying to “go for it” without knowing where she stands is probably going to lead to you being shot down and supreme awkwardness. Why put yourself (and her) through that? Don’t surprise her. This is new for you both so it’s something you need to talk about.
Ask her if she wants to try something more. Tell her you you want to finger her or go down on her. (If you’re worried you don’t know how to do something, check the sex advice tags because I give many ‘how to’ tips.) Focus this next step on something FOR her. Give before you even think about asking to receive – understand? Don’t ask her for a handjob, ask her if she would want you to do something for her.
If she’s ready for more, she’s likely to offer to return the favor. (Note: I’m not guaranteeing that she will, that’s up to her and what she’s ready for, I’m just suggesting that it’s a possibility.) If you show interest in HER sexual needs, it shows that you actually care about her, not just getting off. It’s a good way to get a girl excited about sexually pleasing you in return. The ice will be broken, curiosity abounds, etc. Just have fun with it and be safe.
If she’s not ready for more, then make your peace with that, and keep being best friends with your hand. 🙂
The best thing you can do is explain to him that you want to take it slow. You don’t have to tell him everything that happened to you right away. Just start off by explaining that you had a bad experience in the past and you need things to move at a pace you’re comfortable with. If he understands that you want to be the one to initiate something, then he should back off and let that happen. If he doesn’t, he’s not someone you want to be with anyway.
You might have some flashbacks and bad moments and times where things move just a little too fast before you’re ready for them to happen and that’s okay! Just don’t give up. It’s not going to feel like that for forever.
First, you need to trust the person you’re with. Nothing is going to feel right or safe or comfortable for you unless you trust them. So focus on building your relationship with him rather than focusing on sex with him. Get to know him better, let him know you better, become close friends, and take small steps towards physical intimacy.
If he’s the right person, he’ll respect the boundaries you set, and you will be able to get through it together. Don’t close yourself off though, it’s too easy to do that, and it’s not going to get you what you want. Be clear with him about what’s okay and what isn’t. Don’t ever be afraid to tell him you want to stop or you’re not comfortable with something. It is your body, your right, YOUR DECISION. It’s not something to be ashamed of or embarrassed about. If you need to stop, then you need to stop. There is always a new day.
No one is allowed to take away your choice. It is your right to choose what you want. If they try to force you to do something you are not comfortable with then THEY are wrong and you should be angry with them for ever trying to make you do it. You are not wrong, THEY are. You have the right to stand up for yourself and say what it is you want, no one, NO ONE, is allowed to make you do anything sexually that you do not want to do. If anything like that happens, you need to tell someone and report them.
I know you like him and you’re worried this “problem” will drive him away, but you can’t think like that. This isn’t about his happiness. This is about your happiness AND his. A relationship is about partnership. When you’re with someone, whatever you go through, they’re going to be in it with you. Together. If he’s the right person, he will be supportive of you, he will protect you, and he will be your partner. You’ve isolated yourself for long enough. Trust is the first step.

Boring. Try again when you have something more original.
Well, first, I have to admit that I find it unlikely that it was an “accident”. I mean, it is possibly for that to happen accidentally, but very unlikely, especially since it was such a well aimed “slip” that made you bleed… It sounds like a guy trying to pass off what he did as an “accident” when, really, he was going for it.
I don’t know this for certain, I wasn’t there, and I’m not saying an accident is impossible, but the skeptic in me really questions this. You should think a little more about what happened and consider whether or not you need to have a discussion with your boyfriend about experimentation and realize that there could be a MAJOR consent issue here.
Secondly, the rough entry without proper lubrication and foreplay undoubtedly caused some anal fissures (tearing) and that’s why there’s bleeding. It should heal on its own, could take a week for it to heal fully, but if you continue to experience significant bleeding/pain after 24 hours, see a doctor.
It’s a very serious process. First, you have to clear the area of all things religious. If there is a cross anywhere within a 100 foot radius, Jesus will know what you’re doing and you’ll go to hell immediately. Once that’s done, you must play Tegan and Sara on repeat. Before you begin the sex, you both must pray the goddess Ellen and receive her blessing. Then comes the main event. Start with the pussy. You each must find a cat to pet in unison. After awhile of that comes the scissoring. You’ll take turns cutting each other’s hair until you both have achieved Justin Bieber’s 2009 ‘do. To finish, watch an episode of The L Word together.

It’s totally a thing.