razorblade-eyes:

sofa-kills:

made and posted these all over my school… my gender study’s teacher was really happy ⭐️⭐️⭐️

based off the post made by punkbeds and elaborated by skelebrina

“boys that insult others to compliment you”

THAT WAS THE RED FLAGGGG

I have a question, I’ve been struggling for so long no with stamina issues and o could really use some help on what I should be doing and about how long it’ll take to fix. Sorry if this is weird..

Not weird at all! In fact, I’ve already answered this. You can find all the previous questions I’ve answered categorized on the Sex Advice Tags page.

But here’s the post specifically addressing your question.

It’s about practice and building up your endurance as well as “mind over matter”. I gave some specific tips so hopefully you’ll find them helpful and work on it. I can’t say how long it’ll take for you to improve once you start trying them – that’s entirely up to you. But it’s 100% possible – don’t give up. You’ll figure out how to make it happen.

this isn’t a question but I really like what you’re doing with the sex advice. It is a very something many people probably have question s about and need answers without it being awkward. So anyway get back to being awesome.

Thank you! I appreciate it. People do have a lot of questions (understandably) and I try to help in whatever way I can.

The most interesting thing to me, that I’ve found while doing this blog, is that so many people have the exact same questions – but they think they’re totally alone in it! Nope. We’re all in this together and everyone goes through the process of discovery. You can’t discover without asking questions first!

Gonna go back to being awesome now. 😉 Thanks again!

Thank you. It’s confusing for me because I moved on so fast from the relationship after it ended and never really got the closure I needed. Part of me feels bad and part of me doesn’t for her. She wasn’t very nice to me in the past when my ex and I decided to keep in touch as friends. We were in a good place, I felt good about it. He should have stood up for the situation and didn’t. I was hurt by that, made me look bad. Do you think that’s part of the reason he’s reaching out? Regrets

He always comes back to me. Apart of me is starting to think could the
people we are now be a better fit then in the past? We have grown. Yet I
still think what he’s doing is really bad and I’m just as bad for
speaking to him given the circumstances. Very confused by it all.

–

No, I don’t think he has regrets. I think he just sided with the girl that’s currently sleeping with him. Now maybe he’s not as into her anymore and wants something different, so he’s falling back on you. Do you really want to be someone’s fallback plan? Ugh. No. Fuck that! You’re not a runner-up or someone to fill in when he’s bored.

You guys sound like you’re in a bad rut. A cycle of unhealthy behavior where neither of you is really willing to let go completely. No, it’s not because you belong together, it’s because you’re each others safety nets. It’s comfortable. It’s familiar. You know what you’re getting with him.

That doesn’t mean it’s right.

Ultimately, you’re going to decide whatever you want, but you sound like you’re letting your own loneliness get in the way of your good judgment. He’s in your comfort zone and it’s easy to want to go back to that when you feel like you don’t have anything better out there.

But there are better things out there. Better people. People who will excite you and open new doors for you and put you above the rest. You’ll fall in love with someone else and eventually this ex isn’t going to have anymore confusing ties to you – he’ll just be someone from your past, a significant part of your past, but still your past. There will be more clarity with time and distance.

I know you feel like “maybe” there’s a chance, maybe he’s changed, maybe it’ll be better this time, but I’m telling you, especially from how you’re talking about it, it will not work. You’re both feeling a little lonely and nostalgic. That’s the worst combination to try to start up something – regardless of who it is. I promise you that.

Use your judgment wisely. It ended for a reason, don’t go back and rehash it all. You deserve much, much better.

I have a situation that I need help sorting out. My ex of 2 years, we’ve been broken up for over a year now. I left him. Has started to contact me again. Even tho he now has a gf that’s away at school. He plays it off as flirting but If he’s lonely just watch porn, why email me? Ive asked if he’s happy with her why contact me. He stopped for a few days but now started again. Said he thinks of me. I know he looks bad. I need to know why is he doing this now? We haven’t talked in a while.

Give people enough time alone and they start to revisit the past, think about the good things, forget the bad. It’s a selective memory process. You get lonely, you start thinking about the good things in your past relationships, and suddenly you wonder why it ever ended.

It never works out though. Because it’s been so long that you’ve forgotten the stuff that went wrong and the good things aren’t there anymore either because the relationship no longer exists. People get confused and it’s an easy thing that happens when you don’t have your focus being pulled towards the present/future.

I guess my point is, he’s just reminiscing and if you were the one to end it, it likely feels like something unfinished to him. A loose end. A what-if? It’ll take time, more than a year, more than three years, or even until he really, truly falls for someone else before that “unfinished” feeling starts to fade for him.

But make no mistake, he’s not doing this because he’s thinking of you as you are now. He’s remembering the good things and without someone there to distract him (ie. his gf and you should feel sorry for the girl because how would you feel if the situation was reversed ? It’s an awful thing to do to someone), he’s fantasizing about something that’s now only partially real and partially make believe.

Don’t let yourself get sucked back into the past. There’s no point. All you’ll do is go in circles until you end right back up where you were last time and you guys broke up. It won’t even be as good the second time around, it’ll be a mess of old wounds and mixed emotions. Cut him off. Go cold turkey. Don’t talk to him anymore. It’s not worth the confusion.

You don’t want to be part of him hurting someone else and you especially don’t want to repeat a past relationship that ended for a good reason – even if it seems a little fuzzy now. Protect yourself and let him go.