Author: sumptuousdaydreams

i want to try anal. i’ve gotten fingered in the ass before and loved it. its my first time and the person who is up for it is sorta on the larger side. i already know the basics of how to do it and be safe and what not but, is there any way for me to loosen it up a bit before. like masturbating it or something?

How to loosen up on your own?

butt plug

With your partner?

LOT’S AND LOT’S OF FOREPLAY. THIS IS CRUCIAL.

You have to take it really slow and work your way up to it. Rushing is the absolute worst thing you could do. Rimming, stretching your asshole, lubed up fingers, even slapping your ass, all of that will help your sphincter relax and prepare itself. You, yourself, also need to be relaxed otherwise it’s just not good. So try having your partner eat you out while playing with your ass, that way the combined pleasure and stretching/finger play will open you up and relax the muscles there.

KEY PHRASE: If it hurts, don’t force it.

Enjoying Anal Play

Dumb question, when a guy eats you out is there anything you are supposed to do while he is doing the deed? And another dumb question, will he think the v is gross and ugly? I always thought mine was kinda ugly, but that’s just me:p

Your vagina is a beautiful flower. WORSHIP THE V. It does magical things.

When a guy is eating you out, your only job is to enjoy it and do whatever you want to make it more enjoyable for you. Hump his face, grab his hair, push him to where you want him to go, hold him there, roll your hips, WHATEVER YOU WANT. If you’re not enjoying it, then there’s a real problem there and you need to correct it ASAP. You can start by giving him some instructions during.

It’s all about you when you’re getting eaten out so be as selfish as possible because that’s the only way it’s gonna be any good! In that moment, your partner is there to please YOU. So take advantage of that.

Not dumb questions. 😉

Please help me! Any tips on how to give a good handjob ??

– Even with a handjob, foreplay is STILL important. Start off with kissing as always and then slowly move your hand down. Rub his inner thigh, stroke over his crotch when he still has his pants on, then you can gently take hold of him and massage his cock through the material. After you see him getting really into it (you should be hearing some sighs and groans), unbutton the pants and reach into his boxers. Still take it slow at this point, you’re still at foreplay, so consider it “teasing”.

– If you feel comfortable with it, go topless! (I’ve said it before, but guys are big on visual stimulation so getting to focus on your breasts will get them even more hot and bothered.) If you’re not there yet, try just wearing your bra. If you’re leaning over him, wear just your panties or nothing at all so he can see your ass. The more visual stimulation, the better. Also, eye contact is hot!

– LUBE. If he’s not slicked up with something, it’s gonna be hell on his cock so have something prepared! Oil-based or silicone based lube is best for a handjob because it’s slick and doesn’t dry up too quickly. However, if you’re planning to follow this up with sex or some other fun, go water-based because the skin will soak it up and you can move on. It just doesn’t last as long as the others. Now, if you don’t have that kind of lube available, body oil works just as well! Don’t have lube or body oil? Any kind of non-scented lotion will do. Spit should be a last resort because it’s just really not conducive for the BEST handjobs. So try being prepared okay? Get some KY, some Vaseline, ANYTHING. Honestly, if you carry around a small bottle of Johnson’s baby oil in your purse, he will love you forever.

– Find a rhythm and then work it. The goal is to be able to speed it up towards the end, but don’t go insane (especially if you don’t have the upper arm strength or enough lube – ow?).

– Hand positions. There are several different ways to use your hands. You can use your whole hand, your palms only, your fingers, or pinch your finger and thumb together to form a ring. All of the hand job “moves” are just variations of simple grip, stroke, and area touching. Do whatever comes to mind, play around, experiment to see what works and what doesn’t. It’s all fun!

– Best method? The two hander. Take both of your hands and grip the shaft. Ask him if he wants it looser or firmer so you know what the right pressure is. Don’t be too delicate, it’s not a flower! Grip it good, but still ask him what he likes so you know for sure what works. Then, slowly and rhythmically (always with rhythm!) twist both hands in the opposite direction while sliding up and down. It stimulates shaft and the head at the same time AND it makes him feel like there’s two people working on his cock, which he’ll love. Gradually increase your speed. Two hands are better and more interesting than one.

– Variation of pressure is ideal. Firmer going down, looser going up, then do the opposite. Switch it up!

– Keep your wrists loose. IT’S ALL IN THE WRIST. Don’t focus so much on your hands, instead your wrists. The way you flick your wrists and and swirl up and down is where the pleasure is!

– Don’t ever rub, you should always be sliding (or gliding) – you know what I mean.

– Midway through the HJ, give some love to his balls! Different guys like different things when it comes to playing with their balls, so you just have to experiment to find out what your guy likes. Go easy on them though! Be gentle. You can cup them, squeeze them (GENTLY!), move them around in your hands, and even stroke your fingers over them. On your way back to his cock, you can lightly scratch his balls with your nails.

– If you’re into it, pause the HJ for a moment and use your mouth on his balls. Either tongue them lightly or just put your mouth (NOT teeth) on them. If you’re a little gun shy about it, don’t worry. Just be gentle and whatever attention you give there will be received with great appreciation on his part!

– The head of the penis is the most sensitive part so you’ll want to pay more attention to that and be gentle with it. Don’t let it be your ONLY focus though. Use your thumb and index finger to form an ‘O’ shape and move it up and a down an inch or so over the head. You don’t have to move it much, you’re just trying to stimulate the head.

– Gonna use a big word for you! The frenulum is the most sensitive part of the head. It’s a little v shaped mark on the underside of his cock. Try taking a break from the regular handjob and spend like 30 seconds just rubbing the frenulum with light pressure before going to massage his balls and then back to up and down on his cock again.

– When he starts to orgasm and shoot his load, the usual instinct is to speed up your movements, HOWEVER guys actually like it when you slow down and release pressure as they start to orgasm. This is because when he’s orgasming, the head of his penis becomes insanely sensitive, to the point where it’s painful for him when you touch it. So backing off and going easier on him as he blows his wad is the best thing you can do for him.

– Try different positions with each handjob. You can straddle him while he’s lying down, you can kneel while he’s in a chair (make sure you’re comfortable!), you can sit next to him and reach over, etc. Change it up! Change is good. Keeps things new!

– Talk to him. Ask him what he likes. Ask him to SHOW you what he likes. Yes, that’s right, have him jerk off in front of you and then you need to take mental notes of how he does it. Who better to learn how to give a handjob from than the guy who’s been doing it to himself since he was 12?

HAVE FUN!

So I try fingering myself, and I never find it plessurable, just uncortable

So don’t finger yourself then? Just play with your clit and make sure you’re always REALLY wet. You don’t need to penetrate unless your body asks for it. It’s all about listening to what your body wants rather than doing it the way you think you’re “supposed” to do it.

Find something that makes you feel good. Forget about porn. Forget about what other people say. Do it your own way. Hump your hand. Hump a pillow. Rub your clit through your underwear. Anything you want. Find a way to make it feel good for yourself. Penetration is entirely unnecessary.

Ok I’m a girl and whenever i masturbate I just can’t make myself cum. I’ve tried a lot of things but I’m not old enough to buy sex toys. Any suggestions?

It takes time and patience. You’re probably rushing yourself and pushing to orgasm when that’s exactly what you can’t do. It doesn’t work like that.

Set aside an hour or two where you know you’re going to be completely alone. Take a bath, relax, get yourself into the mood, and work yourself up slowly. Guys have it easy where they can just pump themselves into a frenzy for a minute and boom! Girls need more time and it relies a lot on your state of mind. It’s not just what you’re doing, but what you’re thinking, and what you’re allowing your body to feel.

Keep experimenting, focus on relaxing, and you’ll make it happen!

I was wondering if you had any pointers on eating a girl out? My girlfriend’s clit is VERY sensitive and the times I’ve have gone down on her have been okay, but it would be nice if I could bring her to an orgasm. Usually she ends up stopping me at some point, so that isn’t great…I have asked her for any tips, but she says she’s not sure what I should do. So do you have any? btw, I am a guy, and I’m pretty new at this, but it is exciting.

Well, I love that you’re a guy and asking about this! Any guy who wants to learn more about oral so he can please his partner is just fantastic. YES, IT IS EXCITING! haha. Too often guys are just all about them when it comes to sex and they think they know everything, so kudos to you for wanting to do better for your girl!

Now, it sounds like you’re focusing too much direct attention on her clit, especially if she’s oversensitive. So I think the goal for you is to work AROUND the clit instead of touching it directly. The clit is EXTREMELY sensitive and full of thousands of pleasure nerves so bear that in mind when you’re eating her out. Manhandling the clit or going straight to it before any kind of foreplay is a NO-NO. You need to be aware of how sensitive it is and work accordingly. The head of your penis is super sensitive, right? Well, the clit has TWICE the amount of nerve endings that the tip of your penis does. Think about that! While you love direct contact there, she’s experiencing TWICE the amount of sensation that you would, and for some women, it’s often too much that it’s painful. So stimulating the surrounding areas will send all the right messages to the pleasure “center” without the clit needing to be touched directly.

Porn is incredibly misleading and often shows a quick, rough, direct stimulation of the clit, and that’s not what works for most women. So you have to adjust your thinking on that.

Here are some ideas:

– Put PRESSURE on the hood of the clit using your tongue or fingers, but don’t rub it or suck on it! Pressure will stimulate the nerves there without it being too much. You can try flattening your tongue and gently putting pressure on the clit while using your fingers to pump in and out of her. Don’t move your goddamn tongue though! That’ll be too much. Another example of pressure is to take two fingers, place them on either side of the clit (in ‘V’) and push down there while letting your tongue go to town on the rest of her pussy. There’s several different places you can apply pressure to, so experiment, and see what she likes the best! Don’t just rely on her body’s reaction to tell you if it works. Talk to her, ask her how it feels, because men often misinterpret a physical reaction as “good” when really it’s the opposite and then women feel embarrassed to have to correct them. If you show openness and willingness for correction (don’t feel ashamed if she tells you she wants something different – it’s all about learning!) then you’ll get the best experience possible.

– Vibrations are awesome for indirect stimulation so try humming when you’re working down there. (Whole new meaning to whistle while you work!) She may like it, she may not. It’s different for every woman.

– The area around the clit is really sensitive as well, so use your mouth and fingers to work on that without ever actually coming into direct contact with her clit (or as little contact as possible). Also, the area around the vaginal opening (the hole you put your dick in) has a lot of nerve endings! Try playing around there with your tongue and your fingers – start off gently and work your way up to being a little firmer until you figure out what the right balance is for your girlfriend. She’ll start to understand what’s working for her and where her specific spots are so make sure she tells you where it feels really good and you can work on that. Warning: if you find one erogenous spot, DO NOT stop looking for more. It’s good to pay attention to that spot and keep that in your mind, but do not stop there and only focus on that one place. There are so many more for you to discover. One or two is NOT good enough! KEEP GOING!

– Try different positions with her. Changing up the angles can help even when it’s oral. She can sit on your face, she can turn over so you can eat her out from behind, you can put a pillow under her hips, etc.

– Communication is KEY. She doesn’t know enough yet about what it is that works for her, so the more you guys experiment with this, the more she’ll start to learn about herself and what feels good. So you should always keep the lines of communication open and ask her questions about what it is she needs (but don’t ask her ‘how about this?’ every 5 seconds – she’ll want to punch you). Try to make sure she’s as comfortable and as confident as possible about talking to you and giving you direction because it can be embarrassing for girls who are a little shy. Maybe you could even tell her how hot it is when she gives you directions, that you think it’s really sexy, and it turns you on. If she knows that you’re okay with her leading you more, she’ll start to think about it, and you two can work together!

If she’s oversensitive down there, that’s actually a really awesome thing for her! It does mean changing things up a bit, but it also means she can orgasm much more easily than the average woman. Stay away from direct contact with the clit, focus on EVERYTHING else down there, and make sure it’s always nice and wet. You two will learn together! HAVE FUN!