Hi there can I ask for some advice? I turned 18 recently and my friend bought me my first vibrator, I’ve used it twice but I’m all ways sore after I use it. I know because I’m a virgin it would hurt some, but it can get really unbearable. I’m worried that when I do have sex it will hurt just the same. I’ve masturbated before with my fingers, and try turning my self on before I use the vibrator but it still hurts.

First of all, congrats on having a friend who bought you something useful. (;

Secondly, there are lots of reasons that you could be experiencing discomfort.  You said you try to turn yourself on first, but maybe you’re rushing things.  If you’ve masturbated with just your hands before, and that’s worked for you, start there.  Don’t try to rush yourself, think of something pleasant, look at porn, whatever and go slowly.  So once you’re feeling turned on, start fingering yourself or massaging your clit and then incorporate the vibrator.  Also, there’s no reason to start by fucking yourself with it, make use of the vibration.  Tease yourself with it, trace around your clit, all over your pussy, whatever works for you.  And then, work on inserting it. Start slowly, with the vibration off, and as you get comfortable, try dialing the vibrator speed up from there so you’re not overwhelming.  That way you’re focused on the pleasure, and can see what is causing you the discomfort.  If you go slowly, you’re more likely to find the point you’re having trouble with.

Finally, as a warning, make sure to take good care of your toys! Always wash them after use, and check that if they’re the kind that is rubber material, that they don’t have any tears or things like that.  This collects bacteria, and can cause infection, which you do not want.  Some vibrators are only sold as novelty, and thus, no one cares if they meet safety standards, so make sure you’re not using something inside of you that you shouldn’t be.

-teagan.

P.S.

crazedanddonfused said: Also if you’re having problems with being turned on enough before using it, you can get some water-based lube online, or free at a health clinic (or in Spencer’s!) to help.